The Six Islamic Measures for Dealing with a Nammām

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Imām al-Dhahabī (in Kitāb al Kabā’ir) outlines

The Six Islamic Measures for Dealing with a Nammām

(the gossip bearer who carries upsetting tales to those they are reportedly said about):

قَالَ وكل من حملت إِلَيْهِ نميمة وَقيل لَهُ قَالَ فِيك فلَان كَذَا وَكَذَا لزمَه سِتَّة أَحْوَال

"Whoever has gossip brought to him, and it is said to him, 'So-and-so said such-and-such about you,' is obligated to observe six matters:

أَن لَا يصدقهُ لِأَنَّهُ نمام فَاسق وَهُوَ مَرْدُود الْخَبَر

1) He should not believe him, for the one bringing gossip is a fāsiq, and his report is to be rejected.

أَن ينهاه عَن ذَلِك وينصحه ويقبح فعله

2) He must forbid the gossip-bearer from doing so, advise him, and condemn his action.

(الثَّالِث) أَن يبغضه فِي الله عز وَجل فَإِنَّهُ بغيض عِنْد الله والبغض فِي الله وَاجِب

3) He should hate him for the sake of Allah, the Mighty and Majestic, for he is hated by Allah, and disliking for the sake of Allah is obligatory.

(الرَّابِع) أَن لَا يظن فِي الْمَنْقُول عَنهُ السوء لقَوْله تَعَالَى {إجتنبوا كثيراً من الظَّن إِن بعض الظَّن إِثْم}

4) He should not have ill-suspicions about the person about whom the gossip has been conveyed, for Allah the Exalted says, 'Avoid much [negative] assumption. Indeed, some assumption is sin.'

الْخَامِس أَن لَا يحملهُ مَا حُكيَ لَهُ على التَّجَسُّس والبحث عَن تحقق ذَلِك قَالَ الله سُبْحَانَهُ وَتَعَالَى {وَلَا تجسسوا}

5) He should not be driven by what has been reported to him to go and investigate or verify it, for Allah, the Exalted, says, 'And do not spy.'

السَّادِس أَن لَا يرضى لنَفسِهِ مَا نهى النمام عَنهُ فَلَا يَحْكِي نميمته

6) He should not be content for himself what he has forbidden the gossip-bearer from doing; therefore, he must not convey the gossip."